Yesterday, I wrote about why I have a burner phone. You can read all about it here. Obviously not my county lines activities and nothing to do with any other unscrupulous extra-curricular activities you might be thinking about either. The long and short of it is this: it was the best way to protect days off and holidays, time with my family and my own mental health. If you want any justification for that, I refer you to the longer form article.

However, several days ago I also wrote in praise of unpaid elders. You can read what I had to say about them and why I was so keen to praise them here. But I just wanted to quote two sections of what I said there:

I toyed with trying to get ‘full-time elder’ to stick at one point. I was aiming to get us away from implying the pastor is distinct from the elders (which means I’m not wild on the pastor/elder distinction too; all elders are pastors). Not only did ‘full-time elder’ not take hold, on reflection it unhelpfully suggested other elders are only part-time – like eldership is their side hustle or a hobby to be fitted in as and when – rather than accurately portraying they are just as much elders when they do their secular job as they are in elders’ meetings. I haven’t yet found a helpful term, but perhaps the most helpful distinction is the most basic factual one: ‘paid elder’ and ‘unpaid elder’. No distinction in authority, no distinction in ability, no distinction even in terms of how much eldering one does; just the brute reality: a distinction in who gets paid for eldering and who doesn’t.

So, first, I just wanted to highlight my particular view that there ought to be no wedge driven between the pastor and the elders. All elders are pastors and the pastor is an elder. Let’s get that clear first.

The second thing I wanted to quote from that earlier post was this:

Apart from a distinction in the amount of teaching that takes place, there is no distinction between the elders. They are all equally elders, pastors and overseers. They are all equal in authority and all equally qualified on the same biblical terms. The burden for the church that the pastor feels is a burden for the church the other elders feel too.

I am so grateful to those men who labour in the unpaid ministry of eldership. They are men who are elders all the time; they are no less full-time than the man often called ‘pastor’. They are involved in overseeing the ministry of the church. They are involved in the decision-making and shepherding of the church. They are at all the same elders’ meetings, officers’ meetings and members’ meetings as well as taking responsibility for particular pastoral matters, mainly in those scenarios where they are closest to the people requiring pastoral care. They are not less important, less involved or less engaged. They are men who labour in ministry alongside their secular work.

Here are some things that unpaid elders also deal with in the church. They have the same burden for the church and may find many of the pressures just the same. I suspect there is a little difference in that their livlihood does not depend on the church, and this may make some difference to how they experience some of those burdens and pressures. But let’s just park that possibility for now and reckon there to be no material or emotional difference.

Which brings me to my point. If the pastor needs a second phone to protect time with his family while he is on holiday or on a day off, what about the other elders? Shouldn’t they have a second phone too? To which I think the right answer is: yes, probably.

Of course, when dealing with questions about boundaries and practices that are not stated in scripture – Jesus didn’t have a smartphone, for example – we don’t want to be making any hard and fast rules or going in hard with our shoulds and musts. So, before I say any more, let’s just get this straight: if you don’t find it helpful, don’t do it. If you don’t think it’s necessary, don’t bother. If you have the capacity and mental wherewithal to be on call 24/7 and do not feel at all burdened by ignoring calls or picking up, saying you’re busy and can put any further thought of the matter to bed in your mind, all power to your elbow. Save the £4 a month extra I pay for a little phone contract for my second phone. None of this is the stuff of biblical mandate.

However, I don’t think most of us are built that way. Most of us were not built to be permanently on call. Most of us were not built with the capacity to be at everyone’s beck and call permanently and immediately all the time. It isn’t healthy, it wasn’t even possible in time past, and the scores of ministers suffering burnout and worse year after year suggest it simply isn’t how many can credibly function with any sort of happiness or healthiness. Which rather suggests this isn’t unique to pastors and elders, but bears thinking about if you are a butcher, baker, banker or builder who happens to also find themselves permanently on call and facing endless demands and expectations.

Which brings me back to unpaid elders. What’s good for the goose is good for the gander after all. I think unpaid elders having regular time off with family is good. I think unpaid elders having boundaries whereby the church cannot expect them to drop everything and attend to a need is also good. I think it is probably good for unpaid elders similarly to have a second phone or some means of ensuring they are not drawn in to what might occupy them physically or emotionally when they are about the business of resting and recuperating.

I am particularly sympathetic to the need for them to do so just as I am relatively sympathetic to the church member who wants to get their message off their plate. I am sympathetic because I know myself. I know, from the elders side, the unsolicited messages on my holiday that expect me to do something – no matter how well meaning and (in the mind of the one sending it) insignificant – cause me some level of emotional toil. It’s either something I will have to get to or something I am worried about the fallout of sorting. It might be an inconsequential thing in the grand scheme of things, but that is meaningless when the pastor knows it is a landmine to someone (or a set of someones) in the congregation and the issue will have to be navigated carefully. At the same time, from the message-sending side, I know I rest best when things are off my plate. I hate things hanging. I struggle to rest when I am sat on something I could execute now. I similarly find it hard to rest when there is a major matter that is causing me emotional turmoil. I am as prone as anyone to just send the message (though I am a little more wary of doing so these days) because I just want it sorted and to do the thing I need to do. I understand the issue from both sides well enough.

It is for this reason I said in my previous post that I don’t think encouraging church members not to send messages when the pastor is away will work. I don’t think training on it will help. I equally don’t think encouraging them to protect the pastor’s day off will cut it. Few of the messages sent are malicious (those that are should never be sent – day off or otherwise!) Nobody is trying to ruin a holiday. Most don’t think anything of whatever it is they sent at all – it is a matter of little to no consequence. They are totally unaware of the issues that might crop up in the mind of the one who has to deal with it. In fact, the one dealing with it might not quite know what issues may crop up in their own mind until they receive something whereby the cogs start whirring and cannot be stopped! Members are often just getting off their plate the very thing that pastors don’t want on theirs. It is why I am quite sympathetic to them sending the stuff – I am no doubt guilty of doing so myself for these very reasons – and it is simulataneously why I don’t think asking, expecting or teaching them to change will work. It isn’t intended to be difficult and it is a matter of concern and emotional trouble for some NOT to send the thing immediately.

It is precisely for this reason I think a second phone is the answer. Members and others can freely send their messages, requests, concerns and whatever else whenever they want. Pastors and elders can switch off from them freely too. This way, everyone wins. And, given the shared burden and the potential for all the same issues, it is why I don’t see any reason why ONLY the pastor needs it. I would imagine a second phone would be of great benefit to unpaid elders too for all the same reasons. As I say, what’s good for the goose and all that.

The only aside to all of this is a practical one. If all the elders are wont to turn off their phones when they’re away for the sake of their own sanity, it is probably worth organising matters so at least one elder is contactable when any of the others are away. In our case (though we sometimes mess up schedules and find we’re both away at the same time – a problem of a very small eldership) I direct people to another elder when I’m away through automated messaging. Out of office replies, holiday answer machine messages and that sort of thing. Likewise, I try not to bother my other elder while he is away. If a matter is something that requires both of us to think it through, I make it known that it won’t be dealt with until we’re all able to meet and talk. If it is something I can make an executive decision on relatively easily, that is what we do. I expect – given the lack of distinction between us – other elders to do the same.

But I come back to the issue at hand. If I – as pastor – find a second phone helpful for switching off and protecting family time, I suspect other elders might find the same. They may find other ways to protect that time and not have the same issue with interruptions. As I said earlier, this isn’t a biblical mandate. But I reckon giving one another similar space for rest and recuperation is quite important. If a second phone can help with that, why not do it? And if it is helpful for the pastor – and it certainly is for me and I am sure for many others – then, sure, why wouldn’t it be a similar help for your elders? Indeed, it may well be good practice for those in other professions too.