If you have children of the requisite age, I wonder how you have found getting them back to school? For my daughter, there was little to no problem. She was at the same school, with the same class, knew the teacher she would be with and nothing really changed except for the room they would be in. Starting the new school year raised little more than a shrug and she just got on with it.

My son, however, was starting a new school. Secondary school. He was going from his little primary school where everybody knew who he was to a big school where he didn’t know anyone at all. He was the only one from his class going to his particular school. Not only that, he was moving from the primary one class in one room setup for the entire year to the multiple classes, multiple teachers throughout the day and moving between them setup of most secondary schools. Not only that, he was moving from a two minute walk around the corner to get there to navigating buses to and fro for the first time. For him, this was something of a bigger deal.

All of us know what it is to move from one setting to another like that. Most of us have done that very school move ourselves. It can be a little anxiety-inducing at the best of times. But the other matter going on for my son is neurodivergence. He has a few neurodiverse issues that can create a greater degree of stress for him. In his particular case, the primary causes of such anxiety revolve around lack of structure and uncertainty about plans. As such, starting anywhere new requires the implementation of fairly tight scheduling and planning so that we can minimise the change. As soon as he knows what he is doing, where is going, what to expect and this is regular and structured, he is generally happy enough and can get on. We, therefore, do our best to prepare him for what it upcoming and establish routine as quickly as possible.

Of course, there is the inevitable hurdle of the schedule not being trusted until he has physically been through the routine. That is where the anxiety tends to rear its head – what is the routine and, though I may know it in my head, I haven’t actually seen it in practice so it is overly ephemeral. But, as a general rule, a week of doing the same things, understanding the setup, knowing where he is going and what he is doing, and he is essentially fine. Sometimes, he only has to do the thing once and, if that pattern is the one that will continue, he is fine. He has done it, so trusts it, and knows thus will it ever be.

The thing is, you don’t have to be neurodivergent to empathise. We may not have ASD or ADHD, but we do understand the anxiety of not knowing where we’re going or what we’re doing. We may have built up coping mechanisms to work around these things. We might not be prone to uncontrolled anxiety and its various manifestations when presented with new and unexpected situations. But I think we can recognise the underlying anxiety nevertheless. It is common for people to feel happier when some sort of consistent routine is in place in which we know what to expect, where to go and what we’re doing (on some level). We might not have a meltdown if some unexpected event occurs in our day, but we nevertheless just get on better when things are relatively consistent and routine.

I was set to thinking about this in relation to the Christian life. Quite a few of things touted as ‘spiritual disciplines’ you will struggle to find demanded of us in scripture. Even the ones that sort of are in scripture often aren’t mentioned in the form that we think is demanded. Take bible reading as an example. You simply don’t find that command anywhere in scripture, which is interesting. Bible reading is an excellent way to do some of the things scripture does explicitly tell us to do – like meditating on God’s word, for example – but the reading itself is not specifically what is demanded of us. There are all manner of other similar examples. Very few so-called spiritual disciplines are actually demanded of us in scripture.

So why mention this? Because though something is not demanded does not make it unhelpful. Or, to put it more positively, something might still be helpful even though we don’t have to do it. I appreciate some things might be actively unhelpful for some people and, because they’re not demanded, we shouldn’t demand they do them. But I equally can see that, for most people, a particular thing might be helpful and, though it isn’t demanded, might be good for us do to nonetheless.

For example, for most people, reading your bible is helpful even though you don’t have to read. There are all manner of other ways you might meditate on scripture – and if they work better for you, have at it! But I reckon reading your bible is a fairly straightforward way of being able to meditate on scripture. That is to say, I think it is probably going to be more helpful to you than if you don’t bother. Certainly more helpful than if you don’t do anything at all to meditate on scripture. So what we are talking about here are things that might be helpful but are not demanded of us. And when it comes to these sorts of things, there is a lot to be said for consistent routine.

It is entirely possible for me to haphazardly pray and to think a bit about the Lord whenever the thought to do so pops into my head. Again, for the record, there is no biblical compulsion or command that says we must do other. But I reckon having a slightly more consistent, routine approach to these things might make it easier for us. Without wanting to irritatingly caveat myself to death here, it is not for me to say what form that consistent, routine approach should take. I can’t say enough, there is no biblical command to do these particular things at all. But if they would be helpful to you in your goal of knowing the Lord better, and you are serious about that aim, it doesn’t strike me as altogether unreasonable to suggest a regular, routine approach to these helpful things is likely to be more helpful still than some sort of haphazard as-and-when setup.

I was speaking to a friend the other day who was saying just how important he finds rhythms. When the ordinary rhythms of life get disrupted, everything gets a bit disrupted. I find I am built largely the same way. For me – and it may be the same for some of you too – regular patterns and rhythms are helpful to me. Just as they are helpful to my son. And once I have established the pattern of rhythm, not only does it help me do the thing at all, but it helps me maintain the thing.

Of course, I am only too aware of people for whom that approach to life is unconscionable. The idea of rhythms and patterns is anathema. They want spontaneity and the joyous surprise of daily inconsistency. If that is what floats your boat and you are more likely to get into the word on an ‘as the mood strikes you’ basis, I am not here to stop you at all. If you are more of a hearer than a reader and would rather listen to a podcast with two people discussing the Word so that you can then meditate on it, have at it. You do whatever works best for you to honour the Lord and know him better. I just know patterns and routine work well for me and, for many people, consistency is often helpful.

There are three dangers to be aware of here. First, the danger of assuming my form is the biblical mandate. We have to be careful that we only insist upon what the bible itself insists upon. Where the bible doesn’t insist on this form and we have discovered a means of accomplishing what it demands, we must be careful not to baptise our forms as the very thing God demands of all. Unless we can show that this specific thing is demanded by the Lord of all people, no matter how helpful we find it or how legitimate a means of doing something God actually demands it might be, we must be careful not to insist upon it as the way.

Second, we need to be careful not to insist what is helpful for me must be helpful for everyone. It is all too easy to say that reading my bible every morning before work is helpful to me, therefore, that must be a helpful pattern for everyone. It may – for a whole host of reasons – simply not be so. You can extend this principle to almost anything. Unless the bible specifically insists this thing, in this form, must be done this way by every believer, we really shouldn’t insist this particularly helpful form that we have landed on must be replicated by everyone. We can do real damage to people when we insist that patterns, routines or just particular behaviours are helpful to us and therefore must be copied by everyone and are bound to help them too. It often isn’t the case and we can really damage people’s faith and make them feel sub-Christian simply because they don’t find a thing that Jesus doesn’t ask them to do as helpful a practice as you do.

Third, if we are a routine and consistency sort of person, we need to be careful that we don’t turn our helpful patterns into legalistic duties. You might find bible reading extremely helpful. You might find the best way to accomplish that is to set aside a specific time each day and aim to read a certain chunk of scripture every day. For the record, there is nothing wrong with this and it might well be a helpful practice. But it is very easy to begin berating ourselves – or worse, berating others – for failing to consistently follow the pattern when it isn’t something Jesus has specifically demanded of us.

What does God say if we happen not to read the bible one day? Nothing. He says nothing because he doesn’t demand it of us. It’s not the measure of our love for God in and of itself. He doesn’t demand the pattern nor the form. It’s possible our not setting specific time aside that day is symptomatic of our underlying view of God, but it isn’t necessarily. There are some days I don’t tell my wife or children that I love them. Is that symptomatic of my actual feelings for them? Of course, it could be. But more likely, it isn’t. It might be a regular practice, a thing I usually do, but to not do it sometimes – particularly when nobody is demanding I do it out of necessity – probably doesn’t speak that deeply to my actual feelings. In the same way, we need to be careful that we don’t make what might be helpful patterns and rhythms for us into legalistic means. If that is what we’re doing, ironically, the pattern and rhythm has not been a help to us at all but an active hindrance and we might be better served sacking it off altogether in favour of something else altogether different so that we don’t lead ourselves into a legalism that will damage us.